Scared

How is it that our lives can be destroyed, misshapen and disheveled by the ill intentions of somebody else? You do your best, it’s still not enough. *buhbuh, buhbuh, buhbuh*

I used to feel so good and be so confident, now nothing is good enough. *Buhbuhbuhbuhbuh* my heartbeat races.

Peace and serenity. Hope and Laughter. These things align with no ever after *Beeeeeeeeeeeeeeeep* 

The Enemy is Within the Message

 Arbitrarily you come into my life uninvited, you’re not welcome here, you are no friend of mine. Never do you offer help, you uproot my existence. Xenial, is not how we are, we are not friends, you hurt me and cause me the utmost pain. I feel alone and disconnected, stranded because of you. Obviously you don’t care, you would have me suffocate rather than succeed. Understand this, you will not win, you will not control me. Still feeling abandoned, but will get better, with no help from you. 

Unexpected Ally

“I’m not looking for a friend,” he said solemnly.

He’s not sad, he’s not lonely.

Then one day they strike up a conversation, 

They’ve got a lot in common, age, mindset and situation.

She’s really kind and empathetic to boot.

She’s not like the others, a rare, strange fruit.

“I wasn’t looking for a friend,” the boy says slyly,

“But I found an unexpected ally.”

The young couple celebrate the start of their new life, 

one as the groom, one as the wife.

The gift table, with lavish gifts, was adorn,

but wrapped in brown paper, one gift looked worn.

Who would give such a gift? it really appeared wrecked.

Who would dare show so much disrespect?

They opened the lovely cutlery, bric-a-brac and jewels,

joked about the need for household tools.

The couple ignored the brown paper sack,

pushed it aside, laid it in he back.

An older woman, who appeared one-hundred and one,

hobbled forward to say, "you're not done."

She passed them the lame looking gift, 

which the groom could see left the bride really quite miffed.

Undeterred, they opened the present,

amazed by the contents in it.

There was a plate, etched in gold,

really it was something to behold.

The bride only saw an old broken plate,

but the older woman did not hesitate.

In its prime, the plate was was beautiful, intricate, but weak.

Each fall, bump or scratch would destroy the physique.

One day the plate fell, but it was not broken, 

for each scar made it stronger, and left a token.  

Each wound was stronger, now reinforced. 

The strength was now outsourced. 

Like these cracks, we will be broken.

It's how we recover that needs to be spoken. 

This plate was pretty from the start, 

but with the scars, it's a new work of heart. 

Image Reference:

Montalti, M. (n.d.). Vintage broken JAPANESE Plate repaired with Gold KINTSUGI TECHNIQUE stock photo - image of DECORATION, Emotional: 194821562. Retrieved March 24, 2021, from https://www.dreamstime.com/vintage-broken-japanese-plate-repaired-gold-kintsugi-technique-kintsugi-pottery-gold-cracks-restoration-old-japanese-image194821562

Us Against the World

Us Against the World 

    I know that I haven't been active in quite awhile, I've been navigating a new feeling...happiness. I met my someone and he means the world to me. He is kind, he is funny and he is caring. This is the inspiration for this poem.

I used to think I was a loner, a stray, a meant for no-oner,

Independence was the goal, who'd I strive to be. 

I was stronger than others because I needed nobody,

truth is, I was broken, I just couldn't see.

This person happened into my path,

he broke down my guard. How could that be?

I was scared at first, he'd see me as weak.

This is happening, this just isn't me!

My mind starts racing, 100 miles a minute,

I'm falling apart, doesn't anyone see?

He grasps my hand and holds my heart,

I now love this feeling:

ME is now WE!

Once You Know

Scared, Unsure, Insecure

Before I met you, I was a mess.

Elated, Resolute, Happy

Just being with you gives my heart rest.

Flawed, Scarred, Steady

Afraid to wander, afraid to grow.

Will you still love me, once you know? 

This time of day

I feel the warmth of your skin against mine,

Our lips are joined, in magic they combine.

You know my desires, without being told,

but then again, you know just how to hold.

Our bond is unnatural, but sacred to some.

We’ve not changed our ways, we were born as we come.

When the sun sinks low, I am assured,

that’s just how I know.

This is a wish, and I am alone.